County observes Domestic Violence awareness month

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Every October the Emery County Domestic Violence Coalition promotes awareness of domestic violence issues.
The Coalition held a fundraiser and survivor empowerment and wellness event on Oct. 24 at the Rec. Center in Castle Dale from 9 a.m. to Noon featuring a Zumbathon, a 5k run/walk, a self-defense class, manicures, essential oils, books, domestic violence information booth and door prizes. Miss Emery Brittany Fortner helped with the event by passing out anti-domestic violence pledge cards and sitting at the information booth.
Domestic violence is seen in all areas of the social strata in our communities. Victims who leave their abusers are at a 75 percent greater risk of being killed by the abuser than those who stay. Statistics gathered from June 1, 2014 through June 30, 2015 show that 27 adults and three children died in domestic violence related deaths.
One tool that victims can use to protect themselves is to obtain a protective order from the courts.
A judge issues a protective order and it is designed to provide immediate protection to a victim of domestic violence. The order prohibits an abuser from having any contact with the victim, from threatening the victim, or from entering onto the property of the victim. It is a crime for the abuser to violate the protective order.
An Ex Parte Protective Order can be issued the day the victim petitions for it. Once the abuser is served a copy of the order, it is in effect until a court hearing is held and the judge decides if a Protective Order is warranted. The Protective Order is valid until modified by the court. A judge can also order civil judgments as parent-time that last 150 days.
The following are instructions on how to obtain a protective order:
1. Fill out a Protective Order Petition with the District Court nearest to where you live or where the abuse took place. Court clerks can assist victims with the process or call the victim advocate, Denna, at 636-3250 for help. You can go to Utah State Courts at www.utcourts.gov for online information and forms.
2. Once a petition is filled out by a victim, a judge will review it and decide if immediate action is required. If so, the Ex Parte Order will be issued. The court clerk will then set a court hearing within 20 days at which time the victim and abuser are to appear.
3. At the court hearing, the judge will decide whether to extend the Protective Order. There is no fee to file the petition, obtain a copy of the order or have the order served. Remember this tool is available if you, a family member or a friend is experiencing domestic violence and it can be a part of their plan to be safe. Call 911 in an emergency.
Letter from a victim of domestic violence:
Dear Jennie:
There are many people with stories about domestic violence. I would like to share my story in hopes of helping someone else.
Being so young, I find it hard to remember the little things that have happened to me, but on this particular day, I remember how my life changed dramatically. I was four years old that February. It was the day before my fifth birthday.
That morning I woke up to my mother’s boyfriend yelling and throwing things, and I remember my 11 year old sister, Image, telling me to go hide in the closet. I could hear glass breaking and my mother yelling, “stop, stop, stop” as loud as she could. My sister went downstairs to go take a look and to see what was going on. She told me to stay in the closet, but I was four and was just as curious, if not more curious, than she was. When I got to the bottom step, my mother’s boyfriend was throwing my things around and trying to hit my mother. They were fighting over drugs and were both intoxicated. I saw her boyfriend tip over the entertainment center, and my sister pushed me out of the way. If she would not have pushed me, the entertainment center would have landed right on top of me. The television, and everything with it, went flying across the room. Next was the fish tank, I looked down at my feet and they were soaked. After that, he started breaking all of mine and my sister’s porcelain dolls. He was throwing them across the room, hitting the pictures on the wall and breaking them one by one. My mother took me and my sister over to the neighbor’s house. She and her boyfriend got into the car and took off.
That was a normal thing for my mother to do even without telling anyone in our family. We had to take care of ourselves, and my sister was good at making sure I had everything I needed. The neighbor was supposed to be taking care of us, but she had two kids of her own. I got along with her daughter; we were the same age, and we would go out and play all the time together. On this day when we were playing together, I heard my sister and the neighbor we were staying with arguing. I ran to find out what was going on, and the neighbor was accusing my sister and me of stealing her money out of her wallet. The neighbor called the police. Luckily my sister knew what to do, and called our grandmother. Our grandmother did not live too far from us, and within minutes she was there to take us. She had no idea that my mom had left us there all by ourselves. Had she known that we were by ourselves, she would’ve come and gotten us a long time before this had happened.
My grandmother arrived at the same time the police officers. If she hadn’t been there, the state would have taken us into child protective services. My sister and I would have probably been put into a foster home. The drugs and the boyfriend were more important to my mother than we were. My grandmother took us to her house and got us everything we needed. I remember being so hungry that I was not sure the last time it was that I had anything to eat. I had not had a bath nor my hair even combed in days. My grandma got us all cleaned up, and my father was supposed to be coming to get me to take me out on a birthday dinner. When he found out that my mother’s boyfriend was trying to hurt us, he took me and did not bring me back. I knew that we were supposed to be going to dinner, and I ended up in a different town at his house. This house was horrible as well. After several hours of not arriving back to my grandmother’s house, she began to worry. A little while after my father had taken me, I heard sirens coming up the street. The police were there to take me because my father had kidnapped me and did not have custody of me. My grandmother went to the courts on my birthday and got a protective order against my father, my mother, and my mother’s boyfriend. This protective order stated that they were not allowed to take me out of the town that I was in or they would go to jail for kidnapping me.
This experience has made me the person that I am today. My grandmother raised me since that day. She taught me everything that I need to know. She guided me in the right direction so that I did not end up in the same situation my mother put herself in. I learned how to cope without a mother and a father. As a kid, all you wish for is a big happy family. That’s all I have wished for ever since that day, but I moved on from my experience, and it has taught me how to stay strong and fight for the things that I want, and keep going no matter what happens to you!
Sincerely,
Brandi
Dear Brandi:
Thank you for sharing your story of how domestic violence affected your life as a young child. It is unfortunate that children are often witnesses of domestic violence, and many times they are also victims of violence. Victims of domestic violence can call (435)637-6589 to access services. In addition, there are two victim advocates available. Denna Fausett at the Carbon County Sheriff’s office serves Carbon and Emery Counties and can be reached at (435)636-3250. Debbie Worley at Price City Police Department serves residents of Price City and can be reached at (435)636-3176. According to State Statute, UCA Section 76-5-109.1, committing domestic violence in the presence of a child is a form of abuse. Everyone in Utah is a mandatory reporter of child abuse and must report abuse to their local law enforcement office or to Centralized Intake at 1-855-232-3237. Failing to report child abuse is a Class B Misdemeanor.